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__:: my letters to
you
:: [ ary ] |
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i think i'll start babbling.. if u understand, gd fer u la... everyone feels so messed up now...and it won't change unless we change it ourselves.. but if u sit down and think just for a minute and ask yourself why ur feeling so messed up, you may just realise that ur messed up becoz of..well..love and nothink..<--hard to grasp.. u sit down , think and realise u'r thiking, being paranoid and making a big fuss over practically nothing... for all you know, the person ur thinking about may just be enjoying him/herself, not giving a shit about you..and for all you know, all the fuss that u've worked out within ur brain is for nothing. zilch. zero. In the end u sae to urself, "hey, wad am i doing this shit for? why am i feeling like this when its all for nothink?" you start to realise ... and u start to feel abit better ... but a few minutes later remorse starts to set in..and the whole fucking process repeats itself again. Your brain starts to think bout it.. then you start to think again.. then u realise, then u ask yourself, then u feel better, then remorse sets in.. ah.. thats life... to me that is... that is how i feel.. im sitting here, in the middle of nowhere. watching... The people as they come and go. Shadows of memories, cast upon my soul. I'm losing control, I had to let you go. part of the song... which song dont ask me.. its been scrapped... is this part of the strategy? is this how its supposed to be? am i supposed to feel like this? howwzit gonna end? how..? haix... sKud ary - skidded off the path @ 11:36 PM
tomorrow supposed to go out wit ppl..however it looks like i'll be stuck with my effing family eating some effing fried chicken cooked by some effed up asshole. argh. so damn bloody effing pissed. stupid la... eat oso must go all the wae to fucking johor ? unbelievable idiotic and effing stupid. arGh.. fuck la.. todae went out .. played soccer amgst ourselves... me,yan,khalil,fau,mie,sharul,den,yiwei,zeya,rau...seemed so effing enjoyable until i started to remember bout tomorrow.. fuck laaaaaa... haix... read stuff online tonite..haha.. lalalalalalala... i'll just let wadever that may happen , happen la... im too tired to be chasing ready... haix... like they sae, you can't make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved, the rest is up to the person to realize ur worth. i guess thats very true...... todae splurged on myslef.. ate at longjohns, went arcade, bought ring, bought chocolates... haiz... lucky pay coming in on 12.. can die man..haix...bloody hell.. im effing thinking of somewae to pyscko my effing parents to let me go out tomorrow instead of eating fuckedup chicken cooked by some fuckingasshole in a fuckingmall all the wae in fuckingjohor. ah fuck la... dono where to vent my fucking anger la... fuck sia. gees... think i better go before i start swearing again... bye. fuckedupSKUd there so much to be said.. so much i wanna sae to u.. but oh fuck... wadthe hell... ary - skidded off the path @ 10:54 PM
elo ppl~ haven been here lately~ daes've been busy with work n stuff...tomorrow taking the dae off..butthen not really off coz playing soccer against high sing sec tomorrow~ =S gees... haha... nahmind la.. thurs been booked fer movie... ju-on2 n skool of wock..haha.. haiz.. holidaes burnt arrr.... =S haha~ nahmind la... at least i'll be able to spend the dae with me fwens fer wad may be the very last time... *haha~ saddening huh..* hmm...lotsa things been happening since last week...or maybe not so much la.. hmm... sundae went out with kak bella...mm.. watched scary movie three~ haha~ the thinge started at 6 but we were there at 2.. so had no choice but to walk ard~ =p haha~ went to orangejulius... drank the tripleberry smoothie thinge.. haha~ veh nice~ theen went over to airport.. haha~ i think bella wanna look for someone~ =pPp.. haha~ then went back to cS at roudn 5.30 liddat... Scary moVie3 waS damn Fun n fUnniE! haha~ they spoofed "the ring" wahahaha... veh idiotical but nevertheless fun~! haha~ =p enjoyEd it la~ verie muCh~ =D then.. sent bella home in taXi and went home.... monDae tueSdae occupied with work..been lazing around la... slacking like hell ~ haha but pay still coming in~ veh fun~ =P haha~ hmMmx...cardiac arrest been writing songs ... or rather, we scrapped the first song coz we don really meet that often =S nice lyrics...suits the condition of most of our brains rite now... messed up tt is..haha... gees.. im starting to miss wearing my uniform... miss walking to school, miss going into class and banging into walls, miss disturbing mr chang... haix... i miss dunman dammit... =S haix... damn.. sec school life was so damn short... haix haix haix... argh.. gonna go get dinner now.. see ya guys later~ sKuD ary - skidded off the path @ 9:50 PM
so just now went out..caught Scary mOvie 3.. cool stuff... before that went airport, drank tripleberry something at Orange JuliuS... =S yeah... erm... had fun la.. argH.. i cant update laa... my mind bloody hyper / scared/ fearful/ dont-know-what-to-do.... =S SOWwwwIIiiiiEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeee.... ary - skidded off the path @ 8:38 PM
argH.. haha.. somehow i've given up on using eC... the sites lagginggg... guess i'll be using fwenster... haha~ lalalala~ haha~ this morning was awoken by the vibrating of my fone.. wahaha... i tot hu sia...shwini... *deOw*~ haha.. o yah~! MeRRy xMas EbeRweeOnE!! hMmMm... last 2 nites been sleeping late... wed stayed over at khalil's house.. wahaha.. movie marathon... well.. at least i was la.. khalil and faidhi was sleeping seh... =S then yesterdae played soccer wit de usual ppl.. haha~ we bathed in the girls toilet~! funny thing was, there was a cubicle that was locked from the inside... then we were all thinking "wad the hell.. thers a girl inside!!" then fauzi climbed up and peeped.. noone... but still.. how the heck did it get locked from the inside? did the cleaner climb out of the cubicle or smth after locking it up? or wasssittt... dot dot dot.. deeennn ate and played pool again... wahaha... mmm...yeah...haha~ did nutink much after that la... went homE zzZ fer awhile then went out to eat... at nyte... was very awake... listened to lkp.. thought thought thought.. haha... giving up ready la.. heck la... yeah.. u ask me why im giving up after 3 yrs.. i tell u i'm tired.. then dont ask anymore kae? coz i'll just say... "i dont care anymore la..." currently i'm listening to (brace urself!) daniel bennigfield's *issit how u spell his name?* "never leave ur side"... haha yeah.. so unlike me... but.. his lyrics are nice...haix.. yeah.. other than that been blasting "faint" into my ear and "points of authority" ~ aRgh.. bored.. update later... bye~ ary - skidded off the path @ 1:33 PM
and.. WeLkUm BaCK hUs!! haha... argh.. looking forward to this thurs coz wont be working...*yaY* hmmm..haix... so fast sec school life over..friends parting..but somehow it feels like noone (or issit me?) is taking this seriously.. maybe it hasnt settled in yet.. but it definately has settled in with me..pathetic la.. haix.. life sometimes sucks.. just now went one whole big round in number 3 with alfian... wahaha... talked bout guy stuff la... seems like hes messed up like me too.. mm.. again.. life sucks sometimes.. guess i'll update later... bye.. =\ sKuD ary - skidded off the path @ 10:49 PM
haha.. first things first, wanna congratulate lynn fer the gd audition~.. haha~ haha~ got a new shirt todae~! from u2, this black plain shirt.. haha~ long time since i got a new one fer meself... haha~ aiyo... why everyone showing attitude and scolding ppl oneee? chill la kae ppl... be happy la.. or at least try to~ =) hmm.. im boreeedd... im coldd.... im hunngggrrryyy... and im coughing... haix.. oyah.. lynn.. better take care of yerself kae? And YOU.. i know You like her as well..play fair dude.. may the best man win. haix.. i so wanna get an electric drum.. guess i have to wait bout 4 months.. haix... collect pae first... hmm.. husna returning on mondae.... haix.. bbooorreeeeedddd =( ary - skidded off the path @ 11:14 PM
hmm..this morning buk woke up to the voice of LoOoNIiie~ haha.. i remembered she saying "oiE..u wake up oready not? (then sth sth sth) Go shOwEr kaE?" wahaha... yeah.. thanx fer waking me up thou.. haha~ =D ..then got dressed , met lynn n fis n bella @ the bus stop.. wahaha.. then lynn passed me some stuff... (ThaNkiUUuU~! wahaha.. YEaH.. thaT book Will havE loTsa LotSa lOtsa WoRdS bout mY bwaIn n HearT..) mmm~ then went freaks with shahmi..headed for town, bish bash bish bash went home round 6... wahaha... hmm.. basically nothing much happened todae.. wahaha... listened to Going down in flames by 3doorsdown~ waE nICe!!! haha~ must learn how to plae... mmmm.. wahaha.. im stilled messed up inside... guess i have to chuck it all awae sometime soon coz she's starting school in a few weeks time... haixx.... May we meet again where God lets our paths meet...Someday .... its you............ =S =( ='( sKuD ary - skidded off the path @ 8:54 PM
veri shagged... tired...just got back from job hunting.. managed to get shortlisted for interview tomorrow... customer service line... wahaha... damn tired... todae got my line back... 91801567..thats it... been waiting fer so darn long... haha... buk wants to sae "cOngrats" to all those peeps out there who managed to get into their jC's..and "gD lucK" to those appealing for jC's... yeah... hmm... wad the heck... im going to poly next yr... so yeah... this morning had trouble waking up..haha~ coz last nite was busy smsing LOONIEEE till 4.. wahaha...felt abit better...yeah... im hunngggrrryy..... just now ate at Lj... damn... first time i cudnt finish fast food..totally succky.... haix.. waiting for anak metropolitan to start.. will be gone soon i guess... dPrSkUd ary - skidded off the path @ 9:00 PM
hmm.. yesterdae nite was a complete nightmare.. i did wad i didnt ever want to do...haix.. aniwaes.. slept at 530 and had to wake up around 9 to get ready for the soccer thinge at school..luckily noone noticed wad happened [i wont tell anione so quit pondering.] and life proceeded as per normal...and i wanna sae a big thankiu to hus who managed to sms me last nite~ =) tomorrow gonna watch movie with usual ppl~ looking forward to that...guess I better run now... nothing much to do rite here.. u take care guys~ see ya around.... and... dont sms me coz i dont have a handfone to reply you. peace. dpRs_sKuD ary - skidded off the path @ 8:52 PM
argh im bored..todae didnt do anithink much...in the afternoon went over to faidhi's father's wedding then played pool with the usual ppl... been on msn since afternoon, only with breaks at round seven to do stuff...and yeah.. im still bored... got my new template running again~ hope it doesn't cock up like the previous ones~ haha~ love the eye there~ very haunting... tomorrow gonna play soccer with the usual ppl..then maybe in the afternoon go find work.. argghh.. im short of cash...damn....must find work soon... damn im bored...star wars episode one playing on tv... bloody hell.. i lost my remote control.. suuucckkkkyyyyyyy.... argH... guess i'll go surf something.. byE guYs.. DpRs_mEsSed_sKuD ary - skidded off the path @ 9:13 PM
got back a few hours ago from outing with yamakazi.co and sher~ mmm..letsee..in the morning went to lynn's house (wow..kak far looked so diff compared to the last time me saw her!) then went around town window shopping...didnt do much actually... but had lotsa fun~ =) been tired...haven been feeling alright lately...been trying to surpress coughs...i think ive mastered the art to do it..makes me less irritating~ =) gonna see doc tomorrow bout blood in phlegm.. haix...nothing much...wads happening inside is wae different... goodnite gUYs... DprS_sKuD ary - skidded off the path @ 10:53 PM
ary - skidded off the path @ 10:56 PM
hello ppL... doing nutink rite now..lazing around watching tV... chatting with kak far...haha.. im gonna get a laptop next yr..i dun care how but im gonna get oneee~! hmmM..yest went jln rayer with the usual ppl~ fis,lynn,bella,fauzi,rod,ipul,shahmi,fahmy,buk... yups.. haha.. like last yr la.. nuthink much..only that i cudnt enjoy all that fizzy drinks coz was coughing... nuthink much happened yest la.. haha.. for details, click on lynn's uJ~ haha.. mmm~ went out with boDyguarD.co this morning.. went freaks,ate at bK... basically waste our money awae... haha... then met FiS... gavE her her lOng LonG belaTed PRezziE..haha~ went home then boom im here... ...however, wads happening inside is a different thing altogether... tonite got to chat with sakina~ haha... she seems boinky & fun la~ haha... refreshed our memories bout pri skool daes... haha.. still the girl i know i guess.. haha... DpRs_sKuD wads inside is different compared to the outside... sometimes... thats the wae life goes... you put up a face ppl want to see.... you become... someone else... ary - skidded off the path @ 10:55 PM
hope you're doing just fine u guys... i'll see ya around....take care peeps... DepresseD_sKUd ary - skidded off the path @ 12:07 AM
so yesterdae nite was pRom niTe twoThousaNDthwEe~ hmm~ been looking forward to this dae fer like sooooo long, been planning fer like soooo hard... haha .. and then now its over... i really really really enjoyed myself yesternite , thanx to sher and peepS at table 8~ haha~ we rawk! wheee... and now an update on yesternite~ waaahahaha... hmMm.. okae.. so the day started with me going over to cS to get a corsage... where i met yIwEi freaking on the freaKs machinE~! hahaha... turned out he too was getting flowers fer his date~ ahhha~ then went home at round 445... got dressed up in like half an hour... haha~ nearly went bonkers.. tie , scarf or nutink~.. in the end went with sher's advice.. wear no tie or scarf... mmM~ haha.. then started de pRom journey in the mercedes cab~ haha~ picked up Yan... damn laTe man that fella~ haha... but in the end he came down dressed nicely~ white suit and all~ haha... then went over to pick up bella~ haha~ in the cab the driver was mumbling something bout a school having prom last nite and how there were jams on the roads at that time...alot of talking la that fella but what came in my right went out my left ear coz too busy concentrating on waht me was gonna do later~ mmm~ then went over to sherry's.. picked her up.. man was she stunning.. in that ToGa dress... just wow... haha... she went down the stairs and i was like... "waHseh~" haha~ believe it or not.. i was trembling as i attached that corsage to her hand =s haha.. but i hope she didnt notice la~ whEeee~ then.........................Found out some stuff in the merc cab which sherry told me.. im glad they pulled everything off without backfiring.. which would be disasterous.. =S hmm~ then arrived at crown prince hoTel~ haha~ the second ones to arrive~ haha~ then the crowd started filing in and baNg~ ppl started to take pics... flashes were blinding man... one pic after one pic after one pic... haha~ managed to squeeze in a pic of me and mdm rosie wee~ haha~ coool stuff~ very sporting la she~ haha~ ThHhEeenn.. proceeded up to the ballroom... it wasnt as big as i expected... but hey~ the food was great.. escp the chocolate eclairs they served for deserts~ wae wae nice~ haha~ mmm~ then the live band performed... wass.... oookae la.... ThHhennn~! fis WaS pRom qUEeEEN!!! haha~ was expected la~ =D (sorry i had to announce this here fis =SsS) ConGraTs!!!! haha... cOoOL!! theeen... the partying started.. great music... played linkin park , slow tracks... nice man.. just started to dance on the floor... just didnt want to stop... but eventually had to coz was damn thirsty... haha... that was the one nite i enjoyed myself....really did.... mmm~ then journey home was normal...ended up forking out 32 fer cab... =S haha~ but yan and bella helped ~ so no sweat~ =D man.. prom was really a nite not to forget man... thanx ppl who organised it~ rawk oN~! haha okae Okae.. mom bonkers.. shud go now.. bye ppl~! SkUD ary - skidded off the path @ 12:36 AM |
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:: skud silent screams :: me i_c_3@hotmail.com :: you Sometimes,
you think you know so much about me. You think you finally did break the
silence. Think again. Im not that simple. |
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